When to seek outside help for your personal issues.
A lot of men would think that when it’s time to see a men’s counselor, it would be obvious. That a giant billboard will hang in front of you. Similar to if you need to see the doctor. You’re going about your day and you start to get fatigued, a headache, stomach issues, or even something severe and instant like tripping and spraining your ankle. These things are obvious. “I should probably go to the doctor for this”. But mental health, can be so much harder to recognize when it’s time to address it. There’s plenty of situations in which a man might not be aware they should go seek out a professional to guide them through something. Plenty of men walk around each day not knowing how much lighter they’d feel without the weight on their shoulders. How would a man know what that even feels like when his entire life he’s only know the weight he bears? Men who have unknowingly carried it for months, years, or even decades.
So what might you be going through? First off, let’s establish the type of man you may be. Common enough to not be alone in the world without another person to ever understand you, but also still unique in your own lived experiences. You might find yourself as a man who by no sheer luck, are successful in your own right. You’ve developed a career through your competence as a man. Whether it be white collar, or blue collar, you’ve gone far. You bring home the cash, have a place to call home, and maybe family to call your own. You have some quality friends you can always have a good time with but struggle with your vulnerability because they can’t or won’t match you depth. Yet under it all, life doesn’t have the luster you crave. This leaves you with a lot of questions. “Why am I like this?”, “Why do I avoid things?”, “Why does it have to be so hard to enjoy my life?”. You find yourself slowly slipping into anxious thoughts about what could happen, slowly slipping away from your passion for life through depression, slowly drifting farther apart from those you care about. It’s not your fault that you feel unequipped. You weren’t ever shown a way to find that depth to life that you desire. Yet I think we both know at the end of the day, you’re the person who is going to ultimately transform your life into something bigger. You just need a bit of guidance from a professional who knows how to get you where you want to go, and possibly has been where you are.
What does this guidance even look like? You’ve probably realized it hasn’t magically come into you’re life naturally. Maybe not how you wanted, or hoped, through your father, any friends, or mentorship in your profession. Yes, they’ve probably shown you some things, but you’re still left wanting more. And they may not be open or available to get exactly into what you want to talk about or grow in. That’s where a counselor comes into your life. One that is at your service to assist your growth on the path you want to walk down. No other path, made by anyone else. Solely yours. But you may want more than just “talking about it”. You want genuine transformation and intentional growth.
Next post… “The need for men’s counseling and competent counselors in men’s struggles”